Dear Prudence is Slate’s advice column. Submit questions here.

Dear Prudence,

My husband and I bought what was supposed to be our dream home in a beautiful neighborhood. Unfortunately, the house next to us is occupied by the neighborhood crank, an ancient lady who endlessly curses at us and threatens to call the police if we so much as barbecue in our backyard with friends after 7:00 p.m. If she sees our kids (ages 5 and 7) playing outside, she screams at them to stay away from her place.

Last week, I saw my husband and kids laughing while looking out our dining room window that faces the street.

I looked out myself and saw the old lady laying on the sidewalk halfway to the mailbox. I ran out and checked on her. She ended up needing an ambulance and was taken to the hospital where she was diagnosed with a broken arm. After I came back inside, my husband said I should have left her there longer. It turns out that he had seen her fall more than 15 minutes prior. He called the kids over and they all stood there giggling while she tried in vain to get back up! I’m certainly not fond of the old bag, but isn’t what he did setting a terrible example for the kids?

—What Goes Around

Dear Goes Around,

Yes, your husband is absolutely setting a terrible example. “Ms. Meanie is spending two weeks at a rehab facility, and I have to admit it’s been nice to have a break from being screamed at while we play with the dogs in the yard” would have been OK. Not the most compassionate assessment of the situation, but OK! Actively laughing at someone who is in physical pain, on the other hand, crosses a line. The fact that your husband thought this was fine tells me he’s probably not a person who is going to respond with warmth and openness to feedback about it, so put him aside from now.

Tell your kids why their reaction to her injury unsettled you. I think you can do this without shaming them—especially because they were clearly following their dad’s lead—and by giving them a framework for what you hope they will think about people who aren’t kind to them: “It’s fine to dislike the behavior, but we really don’t want to wish physical harm on others or celebrate their pain” would be a good start.

Dear Prudence,

My mother-in-law is a lovely person, but she has a serious BO issue. I’ve asked my husband to bring it up to her, but he says we should just deal with it to avoid hurting her feelings. Easy for him to say! She has mobility issues, and I’m the one who has to drive her to appointments, so I’m stuck in a car with her! Can you offer a tactful way of broaching the subject with her?

—Nose Plugs Would Be Too Obvious

Dear Too Obvious,

Yeah, I don’t think you can just tell your MIL she stinks, especially if you don’t have a solution to accompany your complaint. Sorry, but your husband is right. It’s safe to assume the odor probably has an origin related to her mobility issues—maybe an underlying medical problem, or maybe just a showering challenge that could be addressed with occupational therapy. There’s very likely a solution, but that’s a question for a doctor. Luckily, you are the one going to her appointments with her. Some sneakiness is permissible here. Could you whisper a question, slip a note, or contact the office before your visit?

Dear Prudence,

My parents had me when they were barely out of high school. They didn’t get married, but stayed together until I was 15, when my mother finally threw my dad out because he refused to seek treatment for his drug addiction. He spent the next decade in a near-permanent state of being high. How he managed to survive I will never know. Then he met my now-stepmom, “Candace.” Candace turned him onto fundamentalist Christianity. It made him get sober, but personally, I think he’s substituted one awful addiction for another. At least when he was into drugs, he wasn’t spreading a cult of bigotry and misogyny.

The biggest issue I have is that now that he and Candace have a son, she wants my dad to cease all contact with me. It’s as if she wants to pretend that the life he led before never happened. The trouble is I’m living proof of it. Despite his drug addiction, my dad did make an effort to remain close to me. He now says we can see and contact each other in secret. This is a slap in the face as far as I’m concerned. I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong except refuse to drink the Christianity Kool-Aid, which in Candace’s eyes makes me the enemy. Should I tell my dad either he socializes with me openly as before or he doesn’t see me at all?

—I’m Your Daughter, Not Some Dirty Secret

Dear Daughter,

That is absolutely, 100 percent, a reasonable request.

Catch up on this week’s Prudie.

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I live in a huge apartment complex with about 500 tenants. I happen to live on the back side of the complex, with a window facing the dumpster in the alleyway. Many of the maintenance workers hang out in that alley when they’re not working. I’ve been working from home for six months now, meaning I spend way more time overhearing their conversations than I used to.